Christmas With You
by pandorabox82
Summary: Serena is feeling less than festive after being dragged to the middle of nowhere with Bernie. But her partner always knows how to pull her out of her bad mood, especially at Christmas.


"If I freeze to death, Bernie, I'm blaming you." Serena glared at the back of her partner's head as they trudged through the snow. She hadn't wanted to come to Norway for Christmas, but Bernie had insisted, saying that the cold would do them good. She had been skeptical, to say the least, but had gone along with it, since she wanted nothing more than to spend time with the love of her life. After she had returned from the dead, and had reunited with her children, they had both reached out to each other, the rancor of their separation melting away with the knowledge that they had almost lost each other. And after the disastrous way that she had left Holby, after spending nearly a year recovering from that ordeal and the betrayal of her friends, Serena had finally felt ready to start living life once more. Upon hearing that, Bernie had decided that the best way to do that was to find a remote cabin in the middle of the woods where it would be just the two of them for Christmas.

"You won't freeze, Serena. You're currently wearing more layers than an onion, and we're very nearly back to the cabin. I'll stoke the fire while you make us hot cocoa?" Bernie looked over her shoulder at her, the smoldering look on her face very nearly driving the cold from Serena's body. "And if you'd like, you can add some Drambuie to the milk and make things a little boozy. I know that it won't truly warm us up, but it might lead to things that will cause us to sweat."

Serena nodded a little as she swallowed thickly, her mind conjuring up the very activity that Bernie was alluding to. "That sounds utterly delicious," she finally managed to purr in response, picking up her step so that she could walk next to her partner, catching her hand and holding onto it as tightly as she could with her gloved and mittened hand. "I suppose that this will be the best part of being cold for our entire holiday. At least I can look forward to returning to the cottage when we're home."

"There is that," Bernie replied as she tightened her hand around Serena's, squeezing firmly as they finished their walk. It took everything in her not to sag against Bernie in relief as she fished the key out of her pocket and let them inside their rented abode, and as soon as the door was closed, Serena tore off her boots before shoving them into her sheepskin slippers and padding into the kitchen while she listened to Bernie make her way into the living room. It took a few moments for her to feel like she wanted to peel off her mittens and gloves, but finally, she was shoving them into her pockets and then shrugging out of her coat, laying it over the back of a chair before rummaging around in the cupboards for the cocoa powder. With the cannister in hand, she went over to the stove, setting the cannister down before pulling out a small saucepan and putting it on a burner, lighting the fire to warm it while she pulled the milk out of the fridge.

"Don't you think you should measure?" Bernie asked as she came up behind Serena, wrapping her arms around her waist before pressing a kiss to the side of her neck.

"Where's the fun in that?" she asked as she poured another healthy dollop of Drambuie into the milk, stirring it carefully before dumping in a veritable mountain of cocoa powder. "Do you want to grab me the cinnamon? This needs a kick of a different sort."

Bernie chuckled a little as she stepped away from Serena to do as she was asked. "Do you regret anything?"

"About the way I left? No. I took a stand for what was right, and had my rope cut out from under me. If anything, it's Ric who should have regrets." There was a touch of bitterness in her tone, and she frowned a little, not caring for the fact that there was still this lingering animosity in her heart, even almost a year later. There just seemed to be a stumbling block in her mind when it came to her former workplace, and she knew that it would take many more months, if not years, to move beyond this place of sorrow and anger. "But I'm trying not to dwell on those things, Bernie. I'm trying to just be happy with you. Adjusting to life in a private surgery is a large adjustment, but I'm glad that I'm making it, since the hours are much better. I get to spend more time with you. And that is all that should matter now."

Bernie nodded as she handed over the cinnamon, and Serena tugged the top off before pouring a large amount of it into the alcoholic milk concoction, stirring it in almost lazily as she watched her partner carefully. "If that's too sweet, I'm going to get cavities," she said archly as she raised an eyebrow at her.

"What can I say? I have a sweet tooth that is aching to be placated." She leaned over and kissed Bernie's cheek softly. "And I am going to need an hour or two in front of the fire before I can even start to think about any other way to fill my sweet tooth's desires." Bernie blushed prettily, and Serena let out a sharp laugh as she shook her head. "Really? After all this time together, I can still make you blush with just a few words?" she teased, checking the woman lightly with her hip.

"There's just something about the way you say things, Serena. It's so brazen. I still have issues with being so open with my wants and desires."

Something in Serena melted at that tender admission, and she nodded a little before setting the spoon on the stove so that she could close her arms around Bernie. "But you are much better with physical affection than I am. Even with Edward, I shied away from public displays of affection, like holding hands or kissing for an audience. I've gotten better, with you, but that's because you're so tactile, and I've picked up on that as we've spent more time together. I know that you've been so patient with me thus far, but I truly hope that you never give up on me."

Bernie nodded a little as she shifted closer to Serena's side, picking up the spoon and stirring the hot chocolate a little more to keep it from burning. "I think that fact that we've made it back to this point proves that I love you enough to never push you out of my life. After all, you took care of my Cameron while I was away." Serena nodded as Bernie rested her head on her shoulder, watching the liquid start to bubble a little before Bernie turned off the burner. "I couldn't be there when I wanted to be, and I think that I'll regret that time away from my children as the years go by. Things changed so much while I was presumed dead, and it's like they found a way to live without me."

"We all did, unfortunately. Because dead is usually dead, so you have to find a way to move on with this gaping wound in your heart. At first, it's raw and painful, but then it mutates into this place that you poke and prod as you try to reconcile the fact that the hole is all that you have left of someone that you loved deeply. Cam and Charlotte were able to move into the last phase of mourning, in that they were able to see the hole and recognize that you were not there any longer, but the happy memories that they had of you could fill that hole so that it didn't hurt to poke. I never reached that stage of my grieving; it was always raw because of how we parted. In my mind, you were going to come back and save me from myself. And then that whole incident happened, and I lost my moorings, and it was a miracle from the God I don't believe in that you showed up on my doorstep two weeks later."

"Then I turned your internal pain into external pain."

"Well, yes. I wasn't expecting to see you, so it made sense that I would faint for the first time in my life. Thank goodness you're a doctor and were able to take care of me, rather than having me end up in hospital over something so silly as striking my head against the floor. Before you say it, I know, I probably should have had it checked out at A&E, but we both know how to deal with concussions. We've seen enough of them in our careers."

"Doctors make the worst patients." Serena nodded in agreement as she pushed the two mugs closer to the stove so that Bernie could pour the hot chocolate in them. The scent of what she had created was delicious, and Serena wrapped her hands around one of the mugs as she smiled up at Bernie over the rim.

"Let's head to the living room now, and watch the fire burn as we get thoroughly soused." Bernie let out her rich laugh, and Serena's smile grew at the sound. She didn't think that she would ever tire of hearing that laugh, now that it was back in her life. Letting out a little sigh, Serena began to traipse through the downstairs of the cabin, knowing that Bernie would be following her closely.

The fire was already burning quite brightly by the time they entered the room, and Serena settled down on the sofa before turning on the telly and flicking through the channels until she settled on one that was playing _Die Hard_. "I would have thought you would have chosen a holiday movie, Serena," Bernie said as she sat next to her.

"Um, it isn't Christmas until Hans Gruber falls from Nakatomi Plaza, Bernie," she said with a teasing little lilt, watching Bernie shake her head before snuggling in close to her as the movie continued. "I just wish that _White Christmas_ was playing. I love that movie, even though I am bitterly complaining about all the snow outside. It's better when it is everyone else having to deal with that awful stuff."

"But it's so beautiful when the light reflects off it, causing it to sparkle and shine. That's the magic of winter, and I missed it so much when I stationed out in the desert. I know, it's a weird thing to miss, especially when we don't usually get that much snow in England. But the nostalgia for a snow filled holiday season was so strong."

Serena nodded, marveling that Bernie was telling her so much about herself. She knew that she would treasure those words for a long time to come, and she let out a sweet sound of pleasure as she nodded and lowered her head to rest on Bernie's chest as they focused on the television. There was something so peaceful about this moment in time, and she was determined to relish it for all it was worth. When that movie ended, Bernie grabbed the remote from Serena's lap and began to flip through the channels, settling on a sappy Christmas romance. "Why?"

"Because it is so much easier to veg out when we're just listening to the words and they don't mean anything. You were invested in _Die Hard_." Serena had to give Bernie that, and she nodded before taking another long sip of her hot chocolate, draining the mug before setting it in front of her on the table so that she could wrap her arm around Bernie's waist as she allowed her mind to glaze over, focusing on the feel of Bernie's breaths and the sound of the fire crackling above the noise of the television. Without meaning to, she must have fallen asleep, because the next thing Serena knew, she was being shaken lightly by Bernie, and she snapped open her eyes to look into Bernie's face.

"Yes?" she croaked out as she tried to sit up, finding herself a little unsteady. "I think that I'm still a bit tipsy," she said with a drunken giggle, and Bernie shook her head a little as she helped Serena to her feet.

"It's time to head up to bed. The fire is almost out, and you don't want to wreck your back by spending the entire evening on the sofa." Bernie leaned in and gave her a soft kiss before taking firm hold of her hand and leading her upstairs. She tripped over a few of the steps, and would have fallen if Bernie hadn't had such a firm hold on her hand, and she found herself so grateful for her partner.

As soon as the bedroom door closed, Serena started to pull off her clothes, and by the time she reached the bed, she was down to her pants. Sitting heavily on the mattress, she stared up into Bernie's face once more, taking in the fact that the tip of her nose was red, a dead giveaway that she was also still tipsy, and she held up her arms to her. Bernie's smile widened as she leaned down into Serena, pushing her back onto the mattress and stretching out along her body as she captured her lips in a lush kiss. "Umm, that feels so wonderful," she murmured as Bernie's hands crept up her torso to cup her breasts, her thumbs stroking her nipples into firm peaks.

"I thought that you'd like that," she replied as she started to kiss her way down her neck and chest until she had reached one breast, removing her hand so that she could kiss and suck on her nipple, causing Serena to bow up into those too light touches, wanting more from her Bernie. She was rewarded with a slight laugh and the fingers of her free hand tripping down Serena's torso to slip between her legs and tease her clit with her thumb before fitting two fingers inside her, curving them so that she was rubbing against that sweet spot she had found the second time they had made love. Those gentle touches were enough to have Serena seeing stars, and she gave herself over to the pleasure of Bernie's mouth and hands as she drove her on to higher and higher planes of pleasure.

Finally, Serena came with a sharp groan, her suddenly heavy bones drawing her back down to the bed as she stared up into Bernie's face. "I love you," she murmured as she wound her arms around Bernie's neck and pulled her down against her body, squirming around a little to try and find a comfortable position. Bernie pressed a sweet kiss to her lips before snuggling in close to her and closing her eyes.

"I love you, too, Serena," she mumbled out as she tugged the covers up around their bodies, her cold feet pressing against Serena's legs making her shiver. "Sorry about the feet."

"No, you're not. You always do this, but I love you anyway." Serena kissed Bernie gently before allowing her eyes to close as well, feeling the first tendrils of sleep start to steal over her. "I guess that I can put up with the cold if it means that I get to have sweet moments like this with you." Humming happily under her breath, she drifted off to sleep, looking forward to what tomorrow might bring.


End file.
